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StephenT [userpic]

The history of Middle-Earth (chibi version): Part 28: Hoom!

2nd May 2013 (12:11)

I briefly considered researching numerology and Kabbalism to try and find 'the number of God', but in the end decided that his phone number would simply be 000 0001. Manwë's number is presumably either 000 0002 or 000 0004 depending on whether each branch of the Trinity have their own separate phones.





Part 28: Hoom!



Next time: Part 29: Aquila ex machina

Chibis by tektek.org
Original story by and copyright to J R R Tolkien, ed. C Tolkien: Primarily based on the Silmarillion, but incorporating ideas from the 12-volume History of Middle Earth series.
Questions and comments welcome!

Comments

Posted by: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Posted at: 2nd May 2013 11:33 (UTC)

God uses an iPhone and has wacky incentive schemes to encourage employees to come up with new products? Huh. I guess all those Apple fanboys worshipping Steve Jobs are onto something.

Posted by: StephenT (stormwreath)
Posted at: 2nd May 2013 11:44 (UTC)

Question is, does Melkor use Windows or Linux? He's all about (selfish) freedom, so probably Linux. Sauron would use Windows.

Posted by: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Posted at: 2nd May 2013 11:52 (UTC)

And Aulë has an Android phone and can't understand why God doesn't like it. It can do almost anything His phone can do, after all.

Mairon programmes simple (evil-looking) animations on his Commodore 64.

Posted by: curiouswombat (curiouswombat)
Posted at: 2nd May 2013 12:31 (UTC)
Starlight trees

Poor entwives - their fate predetermined to be Eru-induced obsolescence....

Posted by: StephenT (stormwreath)
Posted at: 2nd May 2013 12:38 (UTC)

You know, much the same thing can be said about the Elves, too...

Posted by: curiouswombat (curiouswombat)
Posted at: 2nd May 2013 17:10 (UTC)
Sailing

No - they were just encouraged to Go West! by being given their own continent... The ents should so have been given something similar - a southern Valinor continent with huge forests like the Amazonian basin.

Posted by: StephenT (stormwreath)
Posted at: 2nd May 2013 18:47 (UTC)

Maybe it's because I've been reading HoME lately, but I got the definite impression Elves were intended by Eru to gradually fade away - literally, into spirits of memory - leaving the world for humans alone. The Valar inviting them to Aman may even have been a mistake, preserving their physical existence for longer than planned.

Then again, I don't think we're ever told what happens to the spirits of dead Ents, so maybe they go to Mandos as well, and then are reborn in the forests of Valinor.

Posted by: erimthar (erimthar)
Posted at: 2nd May 2013 14:24 (UTC)

Little known fact: God actually created the Ents to serve as cellular towers.

And the fact that he thought tree-defenders would be obsolete in the future shows he's not as omniscient as he thinks! (And being not as omniscient as he thinks also proves he's not as omniscient as he thinks... uh, oh...infinite logic loop!)

And I notice God has a smartphone and Manwë doesn't.

Edited at 2013-05-02 14:26 (UTC)

Posted by: StephenT (stormwreath)
Posted at: 2nd May 2013 15:42 (UTC)

God's an early adopter. Of course he'd have the universe's first smartphone!


Posted by: erimthar (erimthar)
Posted at: 2nd May 2013 16:58 (UTC)

And the funny part is, that phone probably came with about as much documentation as today's Apple products do.

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